SCREAM FACTORY PRESENTS 'HOUSE ON HAUNTED HILL' (1999) COLLECTOR’S EDITION BLU-RAY ARRIVES OCTOBER 9th, 2018

HOUSE ON HAUNTED HILL (1999) 

Label: Scream Factory
Region Code: A
Rating: R
Duration: 93 Minutes 
Audio: English DTS-HD Master Audio 5.1 with Optional English Subtitles
Video: 1080p HD Widescreen (1.85:1)
Director: William Malone 
Cast: Geoffrey Rush and Famke Janssen, Taye Diggs, Ali Larter, Bridgette Wilson with Peter Gallagher, Chris Kattan

One night in the house, one million bucks, no questions asked. But there is a catch for anyone who accepts the offer. Murder is a way of life at the House on Haunted Hill, a jolting, effects-ramped remake of William Castle’s 1959 cult classic. Produced by Robert Zemeckis (Contact, Beowulf), Joel Silver (Suburbicon, Predator), and Gilbert Adler (Constantine, Tales from the Crypt), and directed by William Malone (Feardotcom, Parasomnia), HOUSE ON HAUNTED HILL stars Geoffrey Rush (The King’s Speech), Famke Janssen (X-Men), Taye Diggs (Empire), Ali Larter (Resident Evil: The Final Chapter), Bridgette Wilson (Mortal Kombat) with Peter Gallagher (Covert Affairs) and Chris Kattan (The Middle). On October 9, 2018, SCREAM FACTORY™ is proud to present HOUSE ON HAUNTED HILL Collector’s Edition Blu-ray, which includes new 2K scan of the film, new interviews with cast and crew, and much more!

This definitive set includes a collectible slipcover featuring newly rendered artwork and a reversible cover wrap featuring original key art. A must-have for movie collectors, horror enthusiasts and loyal fans, HOUSE ON HAUNTED HILL Collector’s Edition Blu-ray is available for pre-order now at ShoutFactory.com

Geoffrey Rush plays twisted theme park bigshot Stephen Price, who's hosting a birthday bash for his wife (Famke Janssen) at a house that was once an institute for the criminally insane. Five strangers are each offered a chance to earn one million dollars if they can survive a night in the house. But what starts out as a harmless birthday prank soon turns into a night of horrific terror.

Special Features:
- NEW 2K scan from the original film elements
- NEW interview with director William Malone
- NEW interview with composer Don Davis
- NEW Interview with visual effects supervisor Robert Skotak
- Never-Before-Seen storyboards, concept art and behind-the-scenes photos courtesy of visual effects producer Paul Taglianetti
- Audio Commentary with director William Malone
- A Tale of Two Houses – vintage featurette
- Behind the Visual FX – vintage featurette
- Deleted Scenes
- Theatrical Trailer
- TV Spots
- Movie Stills and Poster Gallery

CABIN FEVER (2016) (Blu-ray Review)

CABIN FEVER (2016)

Label: Scream Factory I IFC Midnight
Release Date: July 5th 2016 
Region Code: A
Rating: Unrated
Duration: 99 Minutes
Audio: English DTS-HD MA 5.1 with Optional English Subtitles
Video: 1080p HD Widescreen (2.40:1) 
Director: Travis Z
Cast: Dustin Ingram, Gage Golightly, Matthew Daddario, Nadine Crocker, Samuel Davis

Synopsis: Executive producer Eli Roth presents this reboot of his instant-classic gorefest, which features all-new characters and all-new kills. The story is familiar: Fresh out of college, a group of five friends retreat to a remote cabin in the woods for one last week of partying – only to become snacks for a gruesome, flesh-eating virus. This fresh spin on a horror-comedy milestone stars Gage Golightly (Exeter, Teen Wolf), Nadine Crocker (Deadgirl), Samuel Davis (Machete Kills, Sin City: A Dame to Kill For) and Dustin Ingram (Paranormal Activity 3).

In 2002 Eli Roth brought us the original Cabin Fever (2002), a lo-fi gory delight full of dark humor, a flesh-eating virus, and enough stupidity that it brought a smile to my face in the cinema. It was a refreshingly old school and stupid slice of splatter-horror that had been long missing from the cinemas, and sort of ushered in a new era of cinema-gore in the early 2000s. The movie spawned a pair of sequels by way of the goofy and gross Cabin Fever 2: Spring Break (2009) and Cabin Fever: Patient Zero (2014). The the series never picked up traction the way of say the Wrong Turn movies as a b-tier franchise but I must say I enjoyed both. Spring Fever was directed by Ti West who disowned the movie after reshoots and producer tinkering, but I still loved it for how innapprorpiate and gross it was, a gory mess of a movie. Patient Zero was not spectacular but also a good gory watch. I think what Roth has in mind with this reboot is to start a new franchise with a bit more cohesion than what came before it. I might be wrong about that but what other reason could there be for rebooting a movie just fourteen years old... besides money.

The movie uses the same script as the original Cabin Fever, featuring five 20-somethings who head out to a cabin in the woods to celebrate graduation. There they make fun of the locals, get stoned, drink some beers, have sex and fall victim to a nasty flesh-eating virus that causes them to rot from the inside and turn to on one another, being young and selfish the virus causes each of their worst qualities to emerge as they throw each other under the bus in hopes of surviving longer than the other. 

Using the same script we get a lot of familiar dialogue coming from actors who are decent but pale in comparison to the original cast in my opinion, they're not awful, not all of them anyway... but the comedy and dark humor is toned down which turns this formerly splatteriffic-comedy to a mostly humorlous action horror movie of a sort, and I think I missed the humor more than anything else. 

They do bring the gore though, there's a decent amount of skin-crawling grossness to go around, we have the familiar blood-fingering, the tragic leg shaving scene, the infected spewing a geyser of blood from their mouths, some good stuff. Another familiar scenario involves a dog tearing apart an unfortunate rotter, that happens off camera and we are only privy to the screams and the aftermath, if you're gonna remake something stupid and gross I say go all the way with it, amp it up and push the boundaries, and they just didn't do it. That being said, they do give us some great shots of the infected dogs who are starting to rot away and are acting rabid, but the when they tear apart someone off screen that bothered me. The movie is attractively shot in the scope aspect ration with very nice cinematography, there's even a nice homage to Kubrick's The Shining at the top of the film, complete with a borrowed music cue.  

As the reboot happens fourteen years after the original they do cram a bit too much of the 'what no cell reception', 'I can't play games?' and 'are you kidding me, no wi-fi' which did get annoying. As I said before the characters sort of just regurgitate familiar dialogie but the comedy is toned way way down, and that didn't work for me. The most notable change is that they made Deputy Winston who was portrayed by Giuseppe Andrews in the first movie into a woman, now played by  Louise Linton, who plays it weird but nowhere near as memorable as Giuseppe Andrews. What they did right was fill out the movie with smokin' hot chics, we have Gage Golightly of Teen Wolf and Nadine Crocker - the latter of whom drops her clothes in not one but two scenes, and she's very easy on the eyes.  

The local rednecks are not as fun this time around, the strange kid Dennis doesn't yell "pancakes" either, but we do get a pancake reference which might explain why the kid in the original film kept yelling it. Also missed is the crazy king-fu action Dennis throws out in the original movie, this time he just sort of seems like a boring extras from the movie Gummo. 

Special Features
- The Making Of Cabin Fever Featurette
- Theatrical Trailer

I don't hate this movie, taken on its own merits it has a lot to offer, damn decent production value and cinematography, the cast is decent, the script is now worse than the original with a few modern updates and the gore is nothing to sneeze at, Now as a reboot it doesn't offer anything new, so I have to ask why even make it, why not pump some of that cash into an original idea? As with any business it comes down to money and marketing and what horror fans are willing to spend some hard-earned dough on, and guess what, you cannot blame them for it. Maybe horror fans over the age of thirty might be put off by a Cabin Fever remake, but there are loads of millennials out there who didn't catch the original movie. These teen brats cannot be bothered to seek it out on their own, a movie from 2002 might as well be a black and might TV show from a bygone era to them, not all of them, but a lot. Maybe this new one will lure them in, and that's alright by me, you don't have to love the reboot, but if it turns a few new teens into horror fans that's good for everyone. Cabin Fever '16 is not a bad movie, it's not a great reboot, but taken on its own it offers some good gore and cheap frights that go down easy with a few beers and doesn't require a lot of thought, just like the first one. 

 

RABID DOGS (2015) (Blu-ray Review)

RABID DOGS (2015)

Label: Scream Factory I IFC Midnight
Region Code: A
Rating: Unrated
Duration: 94 Minutes
Audio: French DTS-HD MA 5.1 with Optional English Subtitles
Video: 1080p HD Widescreen (2.35:1)
Director: Éric Hannezo
Cast: Lambert Wilson, Franck Gastambide, François Arnaud, Laurent Lucas. Benjamin Rataud, Guillaume Gouix, Virginie Ledoyen

Synopsis: On the main avenue of a crowded city, Sabri (Guillaume Gouix, The Returned), grips the steering wheel of his car, eyes fixed anxiously on the bank entrance opposite… Then, there’s a sudden explosion, and three masked men race to the car, loaded with stolen cash. Unfortunately, everything is about to go wrong. With the cops right behind them, the car crashes and their boss is killed. Sabri and his accomplices are forced to run. The desperate criminals will stop at nothing to make their escape. Taking a young woman and a father and child hostage, they embark on a crazy, violent road trip that not all of them will survive…

Rabid Dogs is a modern remake of Mario Bava's 1974 cult-classic Kidnapped, and of all of Bava's movies I think that this is the one movie I think would hold up to a contemporary remake, the original was gritty and lean, it lacked many of Bava's stylish visuals, so I was intrigued to see how this would go over as a slick French remake. The movie adheres to the original story almost slavishly from what I remember as the movie begins with a bank robbery gone awry when four masked men emerge from the bank into chaos. The more seasoned of the criminals (Pierre Lebeau) is mortally wounded in the squirmish with police and the skittish one among the group Manu (Franck Gastambide) accidentally blows the brains out of a hostage along the way. In the ensuing chaos they take another hostage, a young woman (Virginie Ledoyen) and flag down a car driven by an older man (Lambert Wilson) with his sickly four-year old daughter in the backseat. When the wounded leader of the group decides to face off against police in a hail of gunfire the remaining three men and their hostages head out onto to the rural countryside to evade police. With the loss of their leader the younger Sabri (Guillaume Gouix) takes over, but he has a tough time reigning in Manu and the more vicious psychopath Vincent (Francois Arnaud) who loves to taunt and molest the female hostage.

The movie doesn't add a whole lot to the story, Bava's original was taught, tense and stripped down to the essentials, this version of the story had more style and a few more moments of character depth, and a few new scenarios. One involving an armed gas station attendant and another at some weird bear-skinned festival in a rural area that brought a note of The wicker Man to the story, which leads to an encounter with a old woman with a bell who threatens to blow the whistle on the robbers which ends in tragedy. 

As with the original the movie is very dour and bleak with no sunshine for any of the characters, also intact is the gut-punch of a twist at the end, which I still love. As a remake the movie it is at least stylish, as a bank heist gone wrong movie without the baggage of being a remake this is a nice tense watch with some good cinematography and a very nice electronic score. The acting is very decent, characters crammed into a tight space, the atmosphere is tense, Lambert being a standout as the quietly intense father trying to get his daughter to the hospital before she dies, he does a lot by saying very little. As I had first assumed when heard about this remake it fares well, its hard to imagine a contemporary remake of A Bay of Blood or The Whip and the Body, but this heist gone wrong idea holds up well in new hands, even if it largely apes the original with only the added benefit of a new stylish veneer for a modern audience, but I love the lo-fi grit of the original.

The movie arrives on Blu-ray courtesy of Scream Factory and IFC Midnight, the stylish French production scores major points for the crisp and stylish visuals that pop in HD. The French DTS-HD 5.1 Surround audio is also crisp and powerful, the pulsing electronic score from composer Laurent Eyquem is probably one of my favorite things about the movie. Extras on the Blu-ray include a ninety-three minute making of documentary (a Blu-ray exclusive), plus forty-two minutes of interviews with the cast, and a few special effects featurettes, plus a trailer for the movie. This is a lot of extras when compared to many of the Scream Factory I IFC Midnight releases we've seen, nearly two hours worth, but they're in French, just like the feature movie.

Special Features
- The Making of Rabid Dogs (93 minutes, Blu-ray only)
- Interviews with the cast (41 minutes)
- Effects, Weapons and Production Design featurette (14 minutes)
- Theatrical Trailer

Rabid Dogs is a very modern and slick update of the Mario Bava cult-classic with very little to add or improve upon from the original, the French production is stylish and slick, easy on the eyes but also largely forgettable. I would say this is one of the remakes that just didn't need to happen, but if you can get beyond that the basic story is tense and claustrophobic tale with a brutal twist, and some may find that the new modern veneer to be more palatable than the raw original, but not me. 

Blu-ray Review: SILENT NIGHT (2012)

 

SILENT NIGHT (2012) 

Label: Anchor Bay Entertainment

Region Code: A l 1

Duration: 94 Minutes

Rating: R

Video: 1080p  Anamorphic Widescreen (2.40:1) 

Audio: English Dolby Digital 5.1 , English TrueHD 5.1 

Cast: Malcolm McDowell, Jamie King, Donal Logue, Lisa Marie, Brendan Fehr, Ellen Wong

Director: Steven C. Miller 

Tagline: He Knows Who's Been Naughty

Synopsis: McDowell and King star as a small-town sheriff and deputy on the hunt for a murderous Santa Claus terrorizing their community on Christmas Eve. But with the streets full of Santa's for the annual Christmas parade, the killer is hiding in plain sight. He’s made his list, checked it twice, and the naughty are going to pay with their lives.

Director Steven C. Miller came onto the scene with a little indie darling zombie feature AUTOMATON TRANSFUSION (2006) and hasn't done a whole lot that I have seen since so I was a bit surprised to him at the helm of the remake of the sleazy Santa slasher SILENT NIGHT, DEADLY NIGHT (1984). Right away let's just say that this is only a remake in the same sense that Zach Snyder's DAWN OF THE DEAD (2004) was a remake of George A. Romero's original, the basic idea is there but they keep it pretty loose and that's a good thing in both instances, DotD '04 is a pretty great film, one of the better remakes of classic horror films along the lines of THE HILLS HAVE EYES (2006) and TEXAS CHAINSAW MASSACRE (2003)  - all remakes that did it right.

There's a fun cast of character beginning with Malcolm McDowell (A CLOCKWORK ORANGE) as the small-town's sheriff Cooper delivering some of the film's best lines, really rote stuff but McDowell nails each one perfectly. Then we have his deputy Aubrey played by Jamie King (MOTHER's DAY) who suffering through some personal loss and self doubt, she's sorta the centerpiece of the film but I found her character not so much unlikable as just a bit too drab in a film cast with colorful caricatures, particularly Donel Logue (GROUNDED FOR LIFE) as a cynical Santa Jim who makes children cry while they sit on his lap as he dispenses the hard truth about xmas, he also delivers the film's greatest monologue, a diatribe about how awful Christmas time really is. Those three our our main characters and then we get a dip-shit Deputy Jordan (Brendean Fehr) and the town mayor plus his slutty daughter Tiffany (Courtney Jane-White, TV's TODD AND THE BOOK OF PURE EVIL) plus a pervy priest. There's not a whole lot of character development nor likable characters  to get behind  but sometimes it's fun just to kick back and watch Santa kill a few fuckers. 

The Santa here is significantly more awesome than the original in my opinion, a hulk of a jolly St. Nick with a huge white beard and one of those creepy translucent masks covering his eyes and nose with blackened eyes, he cuts quite an imposing figure and he's a brutal bastard with no mercy for the naughty, even cattle-prodding a bitchy teen before skewering her with a wood-poker. Setting itself apart from the original film there's not a lot of character development for our slasher Santa, there are no evil nuns at an orphanage, no flashbacks to a Santa raping his mother and I really like the way they handled it, there is an origin story with a cool urban legend element to it. Something they kept from the original film that I liked a bunch was the creepy catatonic grandpa warning his grandson about Santa and his wicked ways.

As kills go we do get some nice homages to the original in the form of electrocution and impalement on antlers and if there's one thing the original did better it's probably these two kills, Linnea Quigley's impalement was a great kill in the original and the electrocution seems to me more of a lift from the second film and I think that too holds up a bit better. This Santa utilizes all manner of weaponry, we get some dismemberment, a blood splattered wood chipper massacre, a brutal head-splitting with an ax, a scythe to the groin and Santa pulverizing someones face with a set of brass knuckles emblazoned with the words "Ho Ho Ho".  The kills are the highlight of the film for me, it's definitely not a character study of a demented mind, just some totally fun psycho-Santa brutality including some flame-thrower shenanigans. 

Maybe the only thing that annoyed me was that for a Christmas-themed slasher I felt that the atmosphere was a bit inconsistent, snow sorta came and went from scene to scene but that's a pretty small gripe. This is a brutal Christmas slasher and a fun remake, perfect viewing with a few seasonal beers and definitely gonna be a tradition from here on in. This one hit the right notes for me, a stylish film with some gruesome raw gore and cool nods to the original. There's not a whole lot of substance here but c'mon now - it's a psycho Santa on the loose with a flame-thrower!  4 Outta 5 

Special Features:

- “SILENT NIGHT: Behind The Scenes” (6:14) 
- Deleted Scenes (4:50) 

                                              

 

Blu-ray Review: NIGHT OF THE LIVING DEAD (1990)

NIGHT OF THE LIVING DEAD (1990)

- The Limited Edition Series -

Label: Twilight Time DVD
Region Code: ABC
Duration: 88 Minutes
Rating: R
Video: 1080p 16x9 Widescreen(1.85:1)
Audio: Englisg DTS-HD Master Audio 5.1, DTS-HD Master Audio 2.0 with Optional English SDH Subtitles
Cast: Tony Todd, Bill Moseley, Katie Finneran, Tom Towles, Patricia Tallman

Director: Tom Savini
Synopsis: Night of the Living Dead (1990)—a George Romero-approved remake of his 1968 cult horror classic, directed by makeup wizard Tom Savini—tells once again the chilling tale of seven people holed-up in a farmhouse besieged by armies of the un-dead. As the terrified little group fights for their lives, they begin to find themselves as plagued by the evil lurking within as by the ravening flesh-eaters battering on hastily boarded-up windows and doors. “Splatter King” Savini keeps things moving—and the blood flowing—as the survivors dwindle one by one.

The Film: Much like the original Romero-directed film we open with siblings Johnny (Bill Moseley, The Devil's Rejects) and Barbara (Patricia Tallman, Army of Darkness) visiting their mother's grave at a remote, rural cemetery - it's a picturesque location with rolling hills covered in green grass overlooking a lake. Johhny is an acerbic and witty and takes great pleasure in tormenting his sister about zombie, intoning the iconic line "there coming to get you Barbara". On cue a man stumbles into the scene, you're thinking it's a zombie but we get a fake out as the film deviates from the original. The man is dazed and injured, mumbles a warning and stumbles off, confused. It's now that we've been lulled into a false sense of security that the undead show up and attack, Johnny struggles against the fiend while Barbara screams her head off, he falls onto a gravestone at a weird angle, his neck snaps, it's brutal. The panicked Barbara flees the scene and eventually ends up at a rural farmhouse. It's here that she meets Ben (Tony Todd, Candyman) a man also fleeing the chaos of whatever it is that's happening in the area, it seems people are turning violent and eating people. We the audience of course realize this is the beginning of a zombie outbreak but remember the characters don't really know what the Hell is going on, they're panicked and stricken with fear. The two set about fortifying farmhouse in an effort to prevent the massing zombie hordes from entering the home. They remove doors from entry ways inside the home and barricade the windows, in the process of looking for lumber they discover the house is not as empty as it once appeared, in the basement they find Harry Cooper (Tom Towles, Henry: Portrait of a Serial Killer), his wife Helen (McKee Anderson), their daughter Sarah (Heather Mazur, TV's Pretty Little Liars) , who was bitten by one of the fiends. She's deathly ill but no one realizes just yet how dire the situation really is. Also taking refuge in the basement is a young couple Tom Bitner (William Butler, Ghoulies II) and his girlfriend Judy Rose Larson (Katie Finneran, TV's Wonderfalls).

Immediately Cooper rubs Ben the wrong way - both are strong headed men of action and have differing opinions on the best course of action to follow which leads to a lot of tension, drama and altercations, some with damning consequences. One of the most noticeable departures from the original is the character of Barbara portrayed by Patricia Tallman (Babylon 5) who is quite the opposite of the blonde, meek and nearly catatonic Barbara (Judith O'Dea) in the '68 film here is a red-haired fire-brand, she starts off a bit  on the prissy side but by the film's end is a zombie-killing bad-ass,  it's a great switch-up . Tony Todd very capably fills the shoes of Duane Jones as Ben - this just might be Todd's finest performance. Special mention of Tom Towels (Stuart Gordon's The Pit and the Pendulum) as the abrasive Harry Cooper, a real bastard, super unpleasant and quite intense, there's a nice exchange of words between his character and Ben as they pretty much fight over a TV - great stuff.

The film has atmosphere to spare, the rural farmhouse proves to be an claustrophobic setting as hordes of zombies try to break-in until they eventually fall through the windows like a mass of insects. The sound of incessant hammering  as windows are boarded up and patched throughout the siege is unnerving, the zombies are slow-moving shamblers, it's creepy stuff. 

This was the first of only four features that splatter-master Tom Savini directed and it's far and away his finest moment behind the camera, the most recent being the "Wet Dreams" segment of The Theatre Bizarre, the weakest of that anthologies vignettes. Perhaps what we have something akin to a Spielberg-Hooper situation on Poltergeist (1982) here with Romero-Savini... it's not likely but apparently Savini's directorial debut will remain his most well-regarded effort. 

The films is shot in color but like the black and white original it is propelled by chilling atmosphere and dread, not gore, though there are certainly moments of grue provided by the capable effects team of John Vulich (Re-Animator, The Hidden) and Everett Burell (Dolls, Castle Freak) whom created some great zombie make-ups for the film. 

The film pretty much sticks to the blueprint of the original save for a few twists, one being the wickedly great finale, there's a delicious irony in Ben taking final refuge in the basement after disputing it so vehemently with Cooper, the final twists are fantastic and the final few shots of the film are eerie and chilling

Blu-ray: Twilight Time offer up Tom Savini's chilling remake of George A. Romero's Night of the Living Dead in a very nice looking MPEG-4 AVC encoded transfer in it's original theatrical widescreen aspect ratio of 1.85:1 (anamorphic). It's sourced from a very nice print, most likely the same Columbia master used for the DVD, I saw no print damage whatsoever, there's a fine layer of grain and while the 1080p image didn't exactly leap off the screen with fine detail it is absolutely an improvement over the previous Columbia Pictures DVD edition.   

The English language DTS-HD Master Audio 5.1 sounds great with some nice atmospheric touches in the surrounds but the majority of the action is front and center, dialogue is crisp and the score and effects sound great. There is an optional English SDH subtitle option.

Special features are culled from the previously mentioned DVD edition and include a theatrical trailer plus an audio commentary with director Tom Savini, it's a relaxed and scene-specific commentary covering many facets of the film, it's quite an interesting listen as he discusses the numerous splatter scene excised from the film by the MPAA and an alternate death scene for "Helen". Something noticeably missing from the Blu-ray is the "The Dead Walk" (24:52) making-of featurette. Not sure why that was not included but I believe for one reason or another not all bonus materials from Columbia are made available to third-party distributors, it would have been a sweet inclusion but it was not to be, however, we do get Twilight Time's signature isolated score track (DTS-HD Master Audio 2.0) featuring the original score by composer Paul McCollough (The Majorettes) which is not found on the DVD. The last item is a 8 page color booklet with color pictures and wonderful writings by  Twilight Time staff-writer Julie Kirgo who always offers interesting insights that put the film in perspective. I must compliment Twilight for the inclusion of a booklet in every release, it's a nice touch and something that's all but disappeared, such a shame. 

Something I never really comment on with releases is the Blu-ray box art and I gotta say that this film has ever really had great artwork associated with it's releases. The Columbia DVD was pretty lame I hate to say it but this Blu-ray is worse, it's just uninspired, worthy maybe of Diary of the Dead maybe but not this. The backside of the booklet features some great original theatrical poster art, that would have been fantastic.

 Special Features:
- Isolated Score Track by Paul McCollough
- Audio Commentary with Filmmaker Tom Savini
- Original theatrical Trailer
- Julie Kirgo liner notes

Verdict: Night of the Living Dead (1990) is a chilling and poignant take on George A. Romero's '68 original, with Romero himself penning the screenplay the film follows the sketch of the iconic black and white chiller with precision with but a few nice surprises. I will offer up that when I take in Romero's trilogy of the Dead I actually throw this on instead of the '68 original - it's that good. As remakes of classic films go this is right up there with The Blob (1988), The Thing (1982) and Invasion of the Body Snatchers (1978) - definitely one of the better horror entries of the 90's and a high recommend. 4 Outta 5 

NOTE: This release was limited to only 3,000 units and is sold out and fetching upwards of $100 on eBay :( 

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Film Review: Piranha 3D (2010)

PIRANHA 3D (2010)

“This summer 3D shows its teeth”

RATED: R
RUN TIME: 89 Min.
DIRECTOR: Alex Aja
CAST: Craig Elisabeth Shue, Christopher Lloyd, Ving Rhames, Richard Dreyfus, Jerry O’Connell, Adam Scott

I have loved director Joe Dante’s PIRANHA since childhood; it’s a great schlocky JAWS rip-off, and an awesome good time. When I heard that Alex Aja would be helming a remake, in 3D no less, I was pleased. I’m not anti-remake FYI, in my defense I would point to THE THING, THE BLOB, and THE FLY as penultimate examples of awesomeness. I am a bit down on 3D though, particularly the 2D to 3D conversion bullshit, CLASH OF THE TITANS and ALICE IN WONDERLAND were lackluster films with shitty 2D conversion. I enjoyed Aja’s previous films HAUTE TENSION and THE HILLS HAVE EYES, though I’ve not seen MIRRORS. It irks me that after a promising start with Haute Tension that Aja has been on a steady jag of remakes, it seems a waste of talent and squandered opportunity, WTF, some originality please. PIRANHA 3D is yet another reimagining, and 3D t’boot, but it seemed like big, dumb, fun, with that in mind, and the wife in tow, I headed off to the local Cineplex to catch this masterpiece of schlockery.

The film opens the day before the annual spring break madness on Lake Victoria, actually Lake Havasu here in Arizona, just a few hours from my house. It’s a sleepy day out on the lake for Matt Hooper (Richard Dreyfus, sorta reprising his classic role from Jaws?); he’s doing a bit of bass fishing, drinking a few beers, singing a song that’ll be familiar to those who’ve seen Jaws, no doubt. An underwater tremor occurs unleashing the pre-historic piranhas that have been trapped in an underwater cavern below the lake. I won’t spoil it, but shit happens. Its fun and sets the mood for the rest of the film.

From there we’re introduced to Sheriff Julie Foster, played by the still totally hot Elisabeth Shue (ADVENTUIRES IN BABYSITTING, HOLLOWMAN) her three kids, Deputy Fallon played by Ving Rhames (PULP FICTION, DAWN OF THE DEAD), Derrick, a sleazy purveyor of a Girls Gone Wild type production, played sleazily by the not-so-baby faced-anymore Jerry O’Connell (STAND BY ME, SLIDERS), Christopher Lloyd (BACK TO THE FUTURE) as Mr. Goodman, the local fish expert and an endless parade of young, gorgeously annoying people who are soon to be chewed into tiny, bloody bits of fish food.

 

What worked for me in this film is actually the dumbness of it all. This isn’t so much a remake of the original as homage to the big, dumb, fun of it. Embracing stupidity seems to be its aim, and its aim is true. An extravagant amount of nudity, breasts galore for the dudes, a glimpse (actually two) of O’Connell’s penis for the ladies. I’ve not seen a bloodier more splatter-filled film in years, pretty awesome, played for schlock, not for scares, though my wife jumped several times. The CGI piranha are pretty laughable, it’s like a SyFy production on steroids with better cinematography and practical effects, but it works. I also enjoyed seeing all these gorgeous sorority/fraternity assholes getting eaten and screaming in pain, what can I say, I work in a hospitality service industry at a University full of wealthy douche bags who appreciate very little. Director Eli Roth (CABIN FEVER, HOSTEL) who cameos as an MC of a wet t-shirt contest, gets a particularly bloody death, good stuff. I won’t spoil all the great gore and deaths; let’s just say if gore is your thing, you’ll not be disappointed.

What didn’t work for me? The 3D is pretty terrible; the 2D to 3D conversion typically looks like shit, no exception here. In fact, a few 3D scenes were pretty flawed; god knows it doesn’t pull you from the gripping storyline, though. C’mon, make no mistake, this is Piranha 3D, it’s all about the 3D tits, ass and gore, and it comes through on all three counts in spades.

VERDICT: I walked in this film expecting a tasteless onsalught of breasts, blood, and guts and I was pleased. My wife enjoyed it, too, laughing out loud a few times, and she hates horror, for the most part. Our first date film was SPECIES II, she still bitches about that. So, don’t go into Piranha 3D expecting an epic masterpiece of cinema, it ain’t. Do go see it to enjoy a more bloody 3D breasts than you’ve ever seen, and more blood, and gore than any summer flick in recent memory. A very fun time, indeed. ***1/2 (3.5 out of 5 stars)